I have recently encountered the words 'Cougar Women' - a term dreamt up by some male or possibly jealous young female to describe an older woman engaged in a relationship with a younger man. The description 'Cougar Woman' infers a predatory mature woman (35-50+) who hunts, stalks, lusts after and imposes her attentions upon some innocent, inexperienced young male.
The traditional description for the older male who does likewise is, 'Sugar Daddy' -- Would it not be appropriate, in light of today's touted 'equality of the sexes' to apply the description of Panther Daddy? Or, where the male is a cheating spouse, then perhaps 'Cheetah Daddy' may fit the bill? Who knows, if enough people around the world pick up on these descriptions then such terms might ultimately become a part of the English language.
We all know that in most cultures throughout history (even today) untold numbers of innocent, naive and inexperienced young women have being forced into unsuitable marriages. The financial, social or political benefits from such actions pass generally to males.
Today however (certainly within the western world cultures) the majority of younger male or females involved in relationships with 'Cougar Women' or 'Panther Daddies' are, far from innocent, naive or inexperienced. They are educated and understand that a 'consideration' or 'benefit' forms the part of any contract. Who's to criticise such liaisons where the partners have a clear understanding and appreciation of the terms of engagement? Certainly -- Not this writer. Under the assumption that we all enjoy but one lifetime, then we should live our lives to the full but with the proviso that in doing so we make every effort to avoid hurt to others.
The younger parties in such relationships can gain many benefits that they may not (perhaps due to social position) normally be able to attain in life. The older party will certainly enjoy the boost to their ego and, no doubt the sexual fun and games that will form a major feature of the relationship.
The Cougar Woman and Panther Daddy relationships are but one aspect of the 'Relationship Age Gap' equation. Statistics indicate that 'Older woman - younger man' relationships have increased substantially throughout that past sixty odd years and that great numbers of such relationships are successful and lasting based upon true and solid love connections.
Thanks to technology, health and beauty facilities of the past 60 odd years there is no reason why older woman should suffer the aging process experienced by their hard working great and great-great grand mothers.
So, this now brings me to this word 'Mature'. As I look around at the excellent physical conditions of some of the older ladies that I know, then the word mature should apply more to the 65 plus age range. An old friend of late, at age 60, had the physique and facial looks of a 35-40 year old. Add to that her 'Leo sign' personality and she attracted (sometimes unwanted) the attentions of males as young as 20. In fact she was pestered for dates by a sane, good looking 22 year-old male and although it was of much concern to her 30 year-old son, it was apparent that the lady in question was somewhat thrilled at the attention and, lets be frank about it. What woman wouldn't be?
I once read a biological article that claimed that the female sexuality peeked at the 35-40 age ranges and the male in early twenties. I would attach some credence to that claim based partly upon personal experience and, after reading the draft scripts of a book written by an acquaintance (Peter) based on his 'Older Woman-Younger man' experiences. He comments that 'where terms of the relationship are understood from the outset (pleasure affair, not a love affair) where the partners experience a powerful mutual instant attraction both physically and mentally, hold strong respect for each other and, perhaps above all, enjoy an unfettered ability to communicate without embarrassment, then such a relationship can develop into an exciting, pleasurable and memorable life experience for both'.
Thank goodness society has changed. Today the older woman, younger man relationship would pass unnoticed. Some 40 years back however, discovery of the relationship would have resulted in the older woman being condemned and ostracized without mercy by society and, principally by her own sisterhood.
I have found Peter's writings of considerable interest because they are based upon the personal diary notes of both parties. The lady in question ultimately lived across the world from Peter and, it is of romantic note that after years of non-communication and, prior to her mental deterioration and demise from a brain tumour she prepared the most endearing letter that, together with diaries were to be passed on to Peter if he was traced and still alive. More information on Peter's book in Ebook form is available at the link appearing below.
So, to the slightly older girls out there ignore the silly terms 'cougar' or 'mature' - if you fancy him, he fancies you and you get on well, then go for it. Doesn't matter if he's younger -- you will both probably have a whale of a time both in and out of the sack? That's the advice of an older gentleman who now unfortunately, is too old to attract a chick and to young to tolerate a geriatric
Short note about the author
Ted Burgess turned to the computer late in life as a mental rehabilitation tool after heart attacks and strokes. For more on Peter's Ebook 'Ignore the Age Gap & Have Fun' visit: http://www.assetsoflife.com/The-Relationships-Place/ignore the age gap ebook.htm