I love getting older, the wisdom, the ability to laugh, instead of getting frustrated. Like the guy sitting in the office next to you who knows everything. I have a few special people in my life like that. Its sad how they get in their own way. Here's a perfect scenario:
You are successful and respected inside and outside of an organization. In fact, clients and customers regularly provide feedback about your superb skills. Your talent speaks for itself and others seek you out for your expertise.
Then something happens-your company is sold, your company merges, you quit your job, you were laid off, or a friend refers you for a new position. Interviewing is a slam-dunk in your mind. Preparation is not an issue because, frankly, you are just that good!
So you do some research, put together a list of questions, pick up your suit from the dry cleaners and voila you are ready to interview! During the interview, you are confident, poised, and articulate. As you depart, you congratulate yourself on a job well done and high-five the vacant elevator's mirror on the way down. You return home and decide to celebrate because victory will soon be at hand.
It is the next day and you replay the interview in your mind. There is not a doubt in your mind this will happen. You think through your compensation package and decide you should be paid at least 30% more than your last job. In fact, you deserve double. Resolute in your decision, you relax confident in tomorrow's promise.
After a few days when the phone rings, you are surprised to discover no job offer yet. Two weeks later, confusion creeps in. Why haven't they called?
Finally, you get the call. "We decided to hire.... ." is all you heard. You are in shock. How could this happen? Stunned with disbelief, you replay the interview again in your mind and convince yourself it is not your fault. You intimidated them. In fact, the interviewer probably thought you could do his job. Besides, there is nothing you could have done differently, right?
Have you ever considered that maybe you did not listen the interviewer? Did you listen for what he did not say? Did you consider where he was coming from? What was his perspective? Did you consider his age? Does it matter? Of course, not, right? Think again.
Would you communicate with a 30 year old differently than a 50 year old? Would both age groups hear the same words, yet interpret them differently? This is where the interview disconnects. Frequently the person interviewing is so wrapped up in their own inner dialogue they never consider the interviewer's perspective.
Here's a perfect example. Sam has 20 years experience with an institutional money management firm and is 47 years old. He is interviewing with Larry who is 30 years old.
After Sam's interview, he calls and says,
"I told Larry I want to work 18 hour days in turbo drives for the next five to seven years, then start to wind down".
Sam thought he knew everything. Obviously he doesn't. Think about it. What do you hear in the comment, "work 18 hour days for the next five to seven years, then start to wind down?"
Is Sam saying he wants to retire in five to seven years? Is he saying he wants to slow down, have less responsibility, or work shorter days? What does he mean, "work in turbo drive for the near future?"
From Sam's perspective he thinks he is leveraging his assets (talents, skill, intellect, etc.). If you are strategic in leveraging your career then the best may be ahead of you, not behind you. Your dreams are not beyond reach.
However, Sam is interviewing with Larry who is 30 years old. Larry heard Sam wants to work for another five to seven years, then retire. Is that what Sam meant? No.
When a 30 year old interviews a 47 year old, he will be concerned about his return on investment, his tenure, his flexibility, and his ability to take direction from someone much younger than he. Therefore, you must consider the interviewer's age, perspective, experience, and biases. The point is, Sam should never have used those words, "work in turbo drive then start to wind down." Why? Because nothing Sam said after that phrase was heard. Larry shut down.
Another example is John. John had been head of sales for two firms over the past eighteen years. He was with one company for 16 years, and another company for six months. However, John's company was acquired two years ago which left him unemployed. During our interview, I asked him to share with me his recent job hunt experiences.
John said,
"I interviewed recently with a 40-year old CEO and he asked me how many years I thought I had left in me".
I smiled waiting for a punch line, yet none ever came. Evidently, John was oblivious to what these comments meant and why he wasn't invited back for second interviews. He didn't see the link his 2-year unemployment.
What do you hear in the CEO's comment? Prior to my first face-to-face meeting with John, I assumed that he was in the same age range as me.
Upon meeting John, I was surprised to find a man that looked at least 20 years my senior. Is that a problem? No. However, when you are interviewing you need to consider the audience, the actors and the script.
As Shakespeare said in As you like it,
"All the world's a stage, and all the men and women are merely players".
So back to the CEO's comment. The CEO is 40 years old, John is 48; but looks 60. The CEO says, "how many years do you have left in you"? What are his concerns? John's energy? Can he do the job and if so, for how long? Is he concerned about retirement, or his return on investment, or his impact on a youthful organization? Are the CEO's concerns legitimate? Yes.
My point is being cognizant of your interviewer's age and how to address your interviewer's issues. Address the obvious.
If you don't address the pink elephant crushing your skull, what are you telling the interviewer? That you live in LaLa Land? Absolutely.
Address the obvious. Put it on the table and address it. What better way to address the CEO's comment than,
"It is interesting you asked how many years I have left in me. People who don't know frequently think I am at 60, when in fact, I am in my 40s. In this field....that's probably been one of my greatest strengths. My grey hair...though my wife hates it...lends great credibility to my clients. As you know, people in the institutional asset management business have a tendency to trust older people. I use any negative...and look for the silver lining. Another great advantage...called wisdom.
Enhance your message with wit and wisdom. Go on with,
"You know, Shakespeare addressed the age issue best in Othello, "You shall command more with years than with your weapons."
Do not be glib in addressing your interviewer's perspective. Address your interviewer's frame of reference, seek clarity and never assume. State the obvious,
"I want to make sure I understand your concerns. Earlier you questioned how many years I have left in me. Help me understand what you meant by the question. Are you concerned about your return on investment, how close I am to retirement, my energy, potential tenure, or my impact on the organization and with clients? Do you have concerns about my energy level?"
If the interviewer is caught off guard, or surprised, allay his fears with a statement such as,
"If I were in your shoes, I can understand why you might be concerned about some of those issues.
Listen to what his concerns are. Write down his issues, then go back and address each one. Speak to your passion, depth of experience, energy level and tenure. Close with grace and style with a comment such as,
"You know I believe that Calvin Coolidge said it best in 1933, ‘Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not: unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination are omnipotent. The slogan, "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race. You asked me earlier in our conversation about my strengths, which I said are tenacity, perseverance and determination. As a determined prospective employee, I genuinely want this job. Are there any additional concerns that you have that I can specifically address?"
Packaging yourself adroitly during the interview process is critical to successful employment. Discover as much as you can about the interviewer prior to your meeting and edit your script accordingly. Write out an interview script; give it to someone else to read and practice. Frequently, the candidate that gets the job is not the most talented or works the hardest. It is the candidate that is best prepared. Managing potential land mines effortlessly demonstrates talent.
I think George Bernard Shaw said it best,
"Life isn't about finding yourself, it's about creating yourself."
And don't forget the hand written thank you note! As Helen Rowland in her 1922 book, Guide to Men said, "The follies which a man regrets most, in his life, are those which he didn't commit to when he had the opportunity". Now go get ‘em!