Are you attracting the love that you want from your current relationship or are you trying to control your relationship by over rowing the boat! You know, many of us try and control everything in our lives, and our relationship is no exception. OK, name me one thing in your life right now that can't be changed or whisked away in the blink of an eye! You can't can you? So, why is that we frantically attempt to control our relationship? Does this really give you the love affection and romance that you desire, or is it only making your partner resentful, angry, and more distant? How often do you try to control your relationship by helping or rescuing your partner without being asked to do so? And, how often does it result in an unappreciative slap in the face? If this is the case then you may be over rowing the boat! Ironically, doing too much for your partner sends a signal of desperation and a lack of self-confidence which results in undermining the emotional bonds of your relationship. So, when I state that over rowing the boat will sink your relationship; I am speaking the unequivocal truth!” Frequently, these issues of self-esteem and low confidence are at the root of many failing relationships, and when they are left unchecked end disastrously.
Remember, the whole premise of a relationship is to share your life with someone, not control theirs! Your partner needs to feel good about him or her self. In essence they need to be their own person!! You are in this together, and if they need help or need to be rescued they will ask for it!! So, try and relinquish your control and surrender! The following examples can help guide you in the appropriate direction, but to make these changes on a permanent level you must get to the bottom of restoring your self-esteem and confidence levels.
Don't help unless they ask you to help
Don't offer a solution unless asked for one.
Don't rescue them from a situation unless you are asked to.
Don't do everything for your mate.
Do listen and be understanding
Do some self reflection and learn to completely love yourself.
Do complement your partner in a way that allows them to be the person they are.
Remember, to attract what you want from your partner you must become the very thing you wish to attract!!!
For more information on how to save and transform your relationship subscribe to my free e-Guide “The secret principles to Saving a Relationship”
http://www.visionquestlifecoaching.com
Best wishes,
David Roppo
”The Relationship Rehab Coach”